Well, its been a while since I’ve been on here. Honestly, I just haven’t known what to write about/ I’ve been doubting myself on whether people actually enjoy reading my little posts/ most importantly, I don’t feel like I’ve been in the right head space or had the motivation to share what I’ve been doing or create new recipes. Ok sob story over…
But seriously, I finally feel like I want to start writing again, as and when I feel like it and hopefully you want to join me too! I thought I’d start with a little update on me and my health seeing as though that’s where this whole blog started a couple of years ago. Things have felt a little more down than up over the last few months, which I put down mostly to the ‘wonderful’ (lets massively emphasise those sarcastically posed inverted commas!!) invisible illness that is, chronic fatigue. It’s taken me on an unexpected journey over the last few years and although I’m somewhat recovered, this illness likes to take me by surprise every so often. Before Christmas, I felt like I really was recovered, and although I was (and still am) seeing my specialist (an endocrinologist for anyone interested) for check ups every quarter, I kind of believed my body was back to full health. I started adding a lot more high intensity training into my work out routine, including both circuit style cardio and weights alongside teaching and training private clients at The Louisa Drake Method where I work. I really felt this training had given me a new sense of purpose and a power over my body again after feeling like it had failed me for so long whilst I was ill. Not only that, but generally I felt more positive and upbeat which gave me all the more motivation to keep going. Unfortunately, come February, I wasn’t feeling that post workout high, my body felt tired, my muscles felt fatigued constantly, and I wasn’t recovering like I should have been. It made me question, ‘How is everyone else around me coping with this intense training but me, the fitness instructor can’t?’…
Soon after, I was due my next blood test/check up and no surprise my results were all over the place, which explained pretty much every symptom I had been experiencing leading up to the check up. Again, I felt that overwhelming sense of, why is my body failing me when I do everything possible to nourish it and look after myself? And alongside this, a real pressure in todays society that I should be a ‘girl boss’ coping with being busy, working out, seeing friends, having a relationship, earning money, whilst not feeling like I’m completing drowning and indeed fulfilling that title of a girl boss. Why am I telling you this?
Here is a reminder that firstly, just because someone looks great it doesn’t mean they are ok. This totally hits the nail on the head with the whole invisible illness thing I keep going on about and the pressures of having to justify why you feel a certain way, but look fine.
Secondly, YOU DO YOU! Everyone is different. That person beside you in a workout class might only need 1 rest day to recover, and maybe you need 3 within a week, which is totally cool and does not mean you’re unfit. Instagram might be telling you that the celery juice craze is just another stupid health hack, but maybe it makes you feel amazing! My point is, there is no one size fits all and it’s important to do what works for you. At the moment, I’m back on track with my health, yet taking each day as it comes and seeing how I feel. I’ve joined ClassPass (which is epic by the way/and you can use it in studios across the world, which is pretty cool if you like to travel and still go to class!) allowing me to choose from hundreds of studios and classes depending on what type of workout I’m feeling, plus I’m getting outside to enjoy long walks or runs which feels good, and hey vitamin D.
Lastly, I’ve been asked quite a lot of questions recently from followers on Instagram, old friends, friends of friends, or been passed on to give advice about chronic fatigue, the symptoms I experienced and my recovery. I’m no doctor, but if I can shed some light and help at least one person who might be going through something similar, then I’m happy.
Damn, I said this was going to be a short post and now I’m a whole page and a half deep. Anyway, I think it’s important to be open and honest, and chat about self love and care; not just self love in a way of lighting candles and putting on a face mask, but actually how we move and feel. Now I can get back to sharing recipes, travel updates, especially my most recent trip to the gorgeous city of Copenhagen, and maybe even start to add more posts with fitness ideas, particularly pre and post natal info after gaining my Level 3 Pre and Post Natal training qualifications towards the end of last year.
Hopefully this wasn’t boring, and if you made it till now, thanks for reading! Now for the rest of my Sunday drinking endless cups of tea whilst watching a marathon of Line of Duty from the beginning.
X SOPHA X